Aliens Just Don't Understand
A parody of "Parents Just Don't Understand" by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince, about the movie "Independence Day"
Parody lyrics by the great Luke Ski
(c) 1997-2009 Luke Sienkowski


(Something you want to add to this briefing, Capitan Hiller?)
(No, Sir. Just a lttle anxious to get up there, and whup ET's ass, that's all.)

You know, aliens that come on down from outer space
Don't know the proper way to celebrate on Independence Day
So, to all humankind across the land
There's no need to argue, aliens don't understand.

Independence Day
Independence Day
Independence Day
(As we goes a little somethin' like this. Hit it!)

I remember one day, I think it was July 2nd
I woke up, gave a yawn, scratched my head and my neck
Went out, got the paper, looked up, and said "Hey,
A spaceship the size of Toledo flyin' over LA"

Meanwhile, in New York, playin' chess in the park
Was David Levinson, when the sky got dark
It was another ship come down from outer space
Got so dark, you couldn't see the crime in front of your face

All across the world, it was the same ol' thing
The biggest UFO scare since 1963
Over London, Moscow, Paris, Rome, and Japan
Just how in the hell are we supposed to get a tan?

David got to work, and my man he was tight
Found a hidden signal in the satellite
He said "It's a countdown, and it won't last long"
Marty said "I just wanna be loved, is that so wrong?"

David grabed his dad, and fought through the bustle
They Escaped From New York, except without Kurt Russell
David went to the White House, he had somethin' to prove
He found (LONE STARR!) oops, worng movie.

President Whitmore, yeah that was his name
He got the job through his Gulf War pilot fame
David told him "They're gonna kill us, take the Earth, and disect it"
Prez said "Looks I can forget getting re-elected"

He told everyone it was a real Code Red
Hoped on Air Force One, and DC they fled
And just like David told him, without any braggin'
They fixed our little red welcome waggon

And even though some idiots would celebrate
4-3-2-1 came the big checkmate
The bottom of the ship shot out some cosmic rays
Turns out July 2nd's just one of those days

The space ship blew LA away to smithereens
Oh well, so much for Carlton and Hillary
So, to all of humankind across the land
Take it from me, aliens don't understand

(Hey, Leroy, did you see the movie?)
(What, Mission Impossible?)
(No, c'mon, man. I saw the movie last night. It cost $474,000,000 to make that movie, 'cause they had to rebuild all the stuff they blew up.)
(You always lyin'. You always lyin'.)

OK, here's the situation
The Earth just faced total annihilation
And their welcome's worn out, they're time's expired
(Let's kick the tires and light the fires, Big Daddy)

That's where I step in, Captain Steven Hiller
Number 1 Top Gun, and now alien killer
Me and Captian Jimmy and the wild Black Knights
Are gonna give those E.T. suckas one hell of a fight

Pay attention, here's the thick of the plot
The ship had a forcefield, we couldn't get in a shot
So I forced one down, and when he crash landed
I got out and shouted (Ship all banged up, who's the man!?)

(Welcome to Earth) but he grinned an evil grin
And said (Boy, I'm gonna tear your butt limb from limb)
Just who do you think you're trying to destory?
I'm made in America, a real Bad Boy

The Fresh Prince of Roswell and he said "Why"?
I said (Eh, I dunno, I'm just a hell of a guy)
But if you wanna rule the world, I won't deny it
Go ahead and take it, PSYCH!, don't even try it

I knocked him out and dragged him in the sun
To army base Area 51
I came to the gate and said "What have I missed?"
"They just destoyed Philly"
Ok, now I'm pissed

These guys are harder to beat than Mike Tyson
That's when David said we should put a virus in
The alien ship, so they'll be disabled
And just like Jazzy, we can turn the tables

(We will not go quietly into the night)
(We will not vanish without a fight)
It's Independence Day, so celebrate with me
Are you ready? I said "Prez, I'm ready to rock, see?"

Me and David snuck on to the ship with ease
(Awww, I have GOT to get me one of these!)
The hero of the battle was Russell Casse
An alcoholic Vietnam flying ace

He once was abducted, but now he's elated
To fly into the light and say (Payback's a bitch, ain't it?)
Let's get the hell outta here before they kill ya
(Must go faster, must go faster) Hmm, that sounds familiar

We shot out of there like a waterslide flume
And then (Boom! Shake, shake, shake the room!)
I brought us home on a prayer and wing
And if you listen close you'll hear the Fat Lady singin'

So, that's the story, and, yeah it was strange
And since then a couple of things have changed
Since my house got blown up, I'm living at a Howard Johnson
And the new nation's capital's Milwaukee, Wisconsin

So, listen, homeboys, don't mean to bust your bubble
But space aliens ain't nothin' but trouble
So, next time, an ET gives you the play
Just remember my rhymes and get the hell away

Independence Day
Independence Day

Hey, yo Jeff, it's July 4th. You know what that means? That's right. That means it's Summertime.

(In the Summer, Summertime)
We're too damn hype

Gonna save all of mankind
We're too damn hype
In the Summertime

(In the Summer, Summertime)
We're too damn hype

Gonna see it six more times
We're too damn hype
New definition of Summer Madness


(Transcribed by Jered "Mr. Tuesday" Perez. Thanks!)