The Dada Slide
An original group dance tune by the great Luke Ski
Lyrics by the great Luke Ski
© 2009 Luke Sienkowski


It's time to dance!… Dance! Everybody to the dance floor!

Everybody to the dance floor, time to dance.
If you really wanna dance, then clap your hands!
Everybody to the dance floor, time to dance.        [hands clap to the beat]
If you really wanna dance, then clap your hands!

All right now, this first part of this dance we call the Earth Walk.
You heard of the Moon Walk? Well this is the Earth Walk. It goes like this:

Put your right foot forward.
Put your left foot forward.
Put your right foot forward.
Put your left foot forward.

See? It looks just like you're walking on the Earth!
Now do it double time, and add a turn around at the end, and it goes like this:

Right foot, left foot,
Right, left, turn around!
Right foot, left foot,
Right, left, turn around!

Now scream! (aaah!)
Everybody scream! (aaah!)

Household use only. Caution, do not immerse in water.
Warning, to prevent electrical shock unplug before cleaning.
That was a shout-out to all the toaster-owners in the house.

The next part of the dance is called the Happy Cow.
First you gotta hunch over and make your fingers into horns. And then you do this:

Tip to the left,
Say "MOO!" (Moo!)
Tip to the right,
Say "I'm a happy cow!" (I'm a happy cow!)

Now you got it, do it double time, here we go, here we go!

Tip to the left, (Moo!)
Tip to the right, (I'm a happy cow!)
Tip to the left, (Moo!)
Tip to the right, (I'm a happy cow!)

Earth Walk!
Right foot, left foot,
Right, left, turn around!
Right foot, left foot,
Right, left, turn!

Everybody scream! (aaah!)
Just scream! (aaah!)

Everybody gargle Cher!
[For 4 measures, we hear four people gargling Cher songs
simultaneously, in particular we hear "Do You Believe In Life After Love"]

Remember, I am the originator of the Dada Slide.
If anybody tells you different, fart in their face,
and have their name legally changed to
"Gladys The Barbarian".

Now this is the tricky part of the dance.
We call it the Virtual Hambone. Pay really close attention. Here we go:

Both hands out front,
Spread your fingers like that,
Pretend you're at a keyboard,
Go 'Clacky clack clack'! (Clacky clack clack!)
Then clap your hands,        [clap]
Quick left knee slap,           [slap]
Quick right knee slap,         [slap]
Then another clap!              [clap]

Then you put it all together, double time, and it goes like this:
Clacky clack clack!
Clap-a-slap-slap!             [Clap-a-slap-clap]
Clacky clack clack!
Clap-a-slap-slap! You!    [Clap-a-slap-clap]
(Clacky clack clack!)     [Clap-a-slap-clap]
(Clacky clack clack!)    [Clap-a-slap-clap]

Happy Cow!
Tip to the left, (Moo!)
Tip to the right, (I'm a happy cow!)
Tip to the left, (Moo!)
Tip to the right, (I'm a happy cow!)

Earth Walk!
Right foot, left foot,
Right, left, turn around!
Right foot, left foot,
Right, left, turn!

Everybody scream! (aaah!)
One more time! Scream! (aaah!)

Hey, has anybody seen my car keys?
It's got a key chain of My Little Pony on it.
Oh wait, they're in my pocket. Nevermind.
Okay, here we go y'all.

Now this is the part of the dance called the Hyperactive Flamingo.
You heard me right, Hyperactive Flamingo. It's real simple.

Right hand in the air,
Now make a beak,
Put your left hand back,
Grab one of your feet.

Now hop one time!                       [1 musical sting]
Now hop two times!                      [2 musical stings]
Now hop three times!                   [3 musical stings]
Now hop twenty-seven times!     [27 musical stings]

…Keep going…   …Almost there!...

Scream! (aaah!)
Let me hear you scream! (aaah!)

Everybody vote Republican!
[For 4 measures, we hear four different fuddy-duddy
murmuring voices saying why people should vote for
Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan, George Bush, etc.,
simultaneously.]

Okay, now's the time when we take everything you learned,
and bring it all together. Do the Dada Slide! Are you ready? Here we go!

Earth Walk!
Right foot, left foot,
Right, left, turn around!
Right foot, left foot,
Right, left, turn!

Happy Cow!
Tip to the left, (Moo!)
Tip to the right, (I'm a happy cow!)
Tip to the left, (Moo!)
Tip to the right, (I'm a happy cow!)

Virtual Hambone!
(Clacky clack clack!)     [Clap-a-slap-clap]
(Clacky clack clack!)     [Clap-a-slap-clap]
(Clacky clack clack!)     [Clap-a-slap-clap]
(Clacky clack clack!)     [Clap-a-slap-clap]

Hyperactive Flamingo!
Hop 16 times!         [16 musical stings]
…Yeah! Now you're all doing the Dada Slide!...

Everybody scream! (aaah!)
I wanna hear you scream! (aaaaah!!)
Come on and scream! (aaaaaaah!!!)
I said scream! (AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!)

[At this point we hear TV's Kyle, Insane Ian, Soggy Potato Chips,
and Odd Austin begging to be released from the crazy person
who has them held captive in a pit in the basement of his house.
This lasts through the rest of the song.]

Scream all you want! There isn't a person around for miles,
Ain't nobody gonna hear you. Now, it puts the lotion
On it's skin or else it gets the hose again!

Puts the lotion on it's skin,
Gets the hose again,
Puts the lotion on it's skin,
Gets the hose again,
Puts the lotion on it's skin,
Gets the hose again,
Puts the lotion-
Hey! Where's my dog, precious?
Hey you, leave my Precious alone!

[end]